JABRONI SAYS:

Listen up fuckface! This site is made for 4:3!

What's that? Too good for 4:3? Don't fret, just for you, I've spread things out extra; just don't come after me when you see how much screenspace gets wasted on your display.

And if you're viewing this on a smartphone, I can't help you. Do yourself a favor and put that thing away.